Phone a Friend

 

Talking about Crohn’s

"If something happens I will tell you"

I recall the days I used to sneak off to drink Modulen with Nesquik Magic Straws during lunchtime. Or the days when I'd sleep in the medical room because I was already exhausted by 11am.

The inevitable conversation we all have with friends... "I have Crohn's disease" followed by confusion or, in the rare instances, "That thing Dynamo has?" ...can be a challenge to navigate. As a child I would hide my condition (as much as a 6 year old can) and growing up I avoided talking about it out of sheer embarrassment.

Secondary school, was the first time I spoke about my Crohn's to friends. I'm not even sure how the topic came up, but I do recall some very "serious" conversations on park and school benches. As I've grown older these conversations have become easier and more casual. In the last year, I have probably spoken more openly about Crohn's to my friends, than in our 10+ years of friendship (no benches required).

The lockdown slow down has taught me many things, but especially: how to be more open about my condition. My friends have always been my first point of call whenever something good has happened or I needed advice; but my condition was always a thorny subject for me. Over time though, I've come to realise that, talking about my treatment, and the whole host of other things that accompany Crohn's, has allowed them to understand this part of my life better and in turn me as well.

I still feel uncomfortable when they express concern for my health "how are you" is a question I want to dodge, alongside the "dating" questions from family. (The answer to both being: "the same as last time") I dislike seeing them worried, and knowing that it is out of concern for me, has always made me feel out of sorts.

Last year I made a promise though- "If something happens I will tell you". I have found that offering information preemptively, allows them to stay up-to-date with "how I am" without me feeling some-type-of-way when they ask.

Are you a sit down serious conversation type, or do you prefer to drop it in casual conversation? Either way, having these conversations becomes easier with time and practise. If your not sure what to say the best opener I've found is "I have Crohn's disease" then tell as much or as little of your story as you are ready to share.

We can break the stigma together. One friend at a time.